playing catch up and growing a baby bump :-)

     Whew! The past few weeks since morning sickness  (FINALLY) let up, I've been playing a crazy game of "catch up." Unfortunately, during the 9 weeks that I was out of commission, real life did not pause. So I've had tons to do, events to schedule, and people to catch up with.  But thankfully the magic of the 2nd trimester has blessed me with more energy lately, making all these tasks much easier to accomplish.  :-)

     About a month before we found out we were pregnant, Josh was approached from a professor of his,
with an opportunity to come on staff as pastor of a church here in Lakeland.  After getting to know the heart of the church and the focus the people have towards missions and meeting needs in the community, we were both super excited and thankful to get the chance to come along side them.  Josh has continued working at SEU and taking his grad classes, so with the addition of the church responsibilities, his plate became much more full.  But after sitting down and mapping out a plan for his week to week, over the past few months everything has meshed really well together.  Coping with morning sickness so soon after becoming apart of Genesis Church, left me a bit disappointed as I had to miss out on events and even attending services the first couple of months. But now that I'm feeling better and am out and about again, I've been excited to get the chance to connect with the people there and begin to get involved.  We're planning on starting a couple's ministry in March that I'm thrilled about and can't wait to get more things started over the next few months.  Its going to be a great year.  :-)

    Over the weekend, Josh and I finally got to have our Valentines Day date. The plan had been to go out for lunch and then make our way to Picasso's cup to paint pottery. But once we got there, we found that there was a birthday party being hosted and so the studio was crawling with kids and the walls were lined with supervising parents shouting above the noise in order to have a conversation.  So since it was so busy, we decided to walk next door and go see a movie instead. During the movie, I started to feel fluttering in my belly. I knew right away what it was since this was the 2nd time I'd felt the baby moving around.  But to my surprise, when I put my hand on my stomach, I could feel the little kicks on the outside too! So I told Josh and he quickly put his hand on my stomach. When I saw the big smile spread across his face, I could tell that he could feel the baby moving around too.  The baby kicked for about a minute or two before we couldn't feel it anymore.  It was such a surprise since  that day I was only 16 weeks, 2 days pregnant. My doctor had told me just a couple days before at my check up that it all depended on where the baby had implanted as to when I would start to feel him/her a lot and how soon that Josh would get to feel kicks as well. She had told us she'd had women as early as 14 weeks start to feel the baby and some not until week 20. But with a large majority somewhere around 18 weeks.  So I was super surprised that the baby had kicked hard enough for me to feel it on the outside of my stomach.  But it was such a fun moment.  It was the perfect addition to our Valentine's Date. :-)

     The upside to how busy we've been, is that its made time fly by.  I'm now 17 weeks pregnant! Which means that we only have 3 more weeks until we find out if we'll be having a little Jackson  or a little Nora.  Both Josh and I think the baby's a girl. For some reason, I've thought that all along. I can't wait to buy huge flower head bands, pink, pink, and more pink.  But at the same time, if we end up having a boy, we'll both be super thrilled with that as well. Josh and his Dad have started the "Annual Grace men camping trips" and Josh has already started talking about being able to take our son along on the camping trips, if we end up having a boy.  So I guess either way, we're both going to be super thrilled. :-) All I know is that our ultrasound on March 12th can't come soon enough! :-)

                                  16 weeks pregnant, gained 5lbs so far and feeling huge!

                                                                                           16 weeks, 2 days pregnant and all set for our Valentine's Day Date   2/16/13- Josh felt the baby for the 1st time :-)

Love, Mama

Our sweet little Grace-Grace (as your Daddy currently calls you),

    We've known about you for 14 weeks, but dreamed about and planned for you for a few years now. Your Daddy is the happiest I've ever seen him and so excited about you. You and I have had a rough couple of months so far, but thankfully you're giving your Mama a break from the food strike you were on and its making the days much easier. A few weeks ago we saw you for the first time. I was covered in instant tears as I watched you flip this way and that way. You even waved to us and we watched as you figured out how to flex your fingers. I wasn't prepared for the overwhelming emotion that filled me while we watched you on the ultrasound screen.  Your Daddy even teared up as we listened to your strong heatbeat thumping away. 
      Since seeing you, its awakened dreams in me that have filled me with such excitement.  I think about you growing up, what your personality will be like. What things will touch your heart, what interests you may have, what direction God may take you. And I'm filled with a sense of awe and thankfullness that I get to be apart of your little life and watch it all unfold.  Life is messy and its not always fair.  But your Daddy and I will always be your biggest cheerleaders through the ups and the downs that come. You're lucky little one, you're coming into a world filled with voices that will always speak life into you. Your Nana and Aunt Salena are so eager to meet you that they are planning a special trip to see your birth. Your Grandpa carries your sonogram picture around with him on his phone to show people. Your great grandparents Schwartz and your Great Grandma Sydor are already praying for you and are so excited about you.  You're coming into a family that loves you so much already. 
         We've got awhile before we meet you Little One, but we're so thankful for your health and all the growing  you're doing. You're our long awaited little gift. And I can't wait to see the part you'll play in our family and person that you'll become. 

I love you to the moon and back little Grace-Grace, 
Mama

Our Growing Grace

                                                        First picture! 11 weeks, 4 days


Today we went to the doctor and saw our baby for the 1st time! I wasn't prepared for the overwhelming emotion that hit me as soon as the baby popped up on the screen. It was instant tears as I saw the little nose and lips, fingers, and toe's. The baby was waving its hand the whole time during the ultrasound and then starting flexing its fingers. It was so crazy to watch the baby react to what I did, like when I laughed or coughed, the baby would flip over. lol. Its still so small so while we watched it flip over and wave its hands, I didn't feel a thing. Josh even teared up in seeing our child for the 1st time. It was like nothing else I've ever experienced.

The past 6 weeks have been incredibly difficult.  At 5 weeks pregnant, I developed morning sickness symptoms and have still yet to understand the term "morning sickness." Its more like "all day and all night sickness." Everyday the past 6 weeks I've thrown up 6-7 times daily. With the exception of 1 day when it escalated to 15 times resulting in me getting dehydrated. My doctor prescribed me some medication when that happened in order for me to be able to keep some liquids down, and so I took it for a couple days in order to give my body a break and give some fluids back in me.  I'm not super comfortable with the idea of taking medication for morning sickness because I'm not thrilled with how morning sickness meds are regulated. They aren't really studied very much, so generally come with the label "unknown risks" since they are a category C medication. So Josh and I opted to save them for when I was got too close to dehydration again, since getting dehydrated is dangerous for the baby as well.  So amazingly enough, getting sick 7 times a day, I've still managed to keep liquids in me simply because I have to double up what I'm drinking.  Its been hard though because I've been mostly a shut in the past 6 weeks since I'm sick throughout the whole day.  Even going to the doctor was hard because I almost was sick on the drive home. One day I was feeling a little better, and decided to make a trip to the grocery store. That was the wrong errand for me to pick. It was a mix of extreme smells all swirled together ending with me being at the check out counter behind a guy that had a roast chicken...I almost lost it. I've tried everything to help and NOTHING works.  Sea bands, crackers, ginger, vitamin B6, peppermints, popsicles, etc....nothing really helps. The baby even wakes me up in the middle of the night to get sick. I've found that so far, our little bundle of joy does not like to me sleep or eat...EVER. lol.  Josh has had a difficult time as well since I can't really eat much besides cereal...neither can he because most of the time I can't handle the smell of food cooking.  lol. So my poor husband is also on the "baby diet" as he calls it. lol.

Amazingly enough, despite being so sick, my belly wasted no time in sticking out.   At 8 weeks my jeans no longer fit and most of my shirts became snug.  Having not gained a single pound, I was surprised at how fast my body began to change. Now at almost 12 weeks, the only pants that fit are my sweat pants and either a stretchy tank top (which shows my rounded belly) or lately I've worn one of Josh's t-shirts since they are big on me making it more comfortable than anything I have.   A friend gave me 4 bags of maternity clothes to sort through, but I've found most of them are still too large for me to wear. So I'm in the "inbetween" phase.  I did buy 1 maternity shirt that was a bit smaller and so I'm able to wear that out when I need to look a bit more presentable than my husbands t-shirt, lol.  As soon as the nausea lifts, I'm planning a shopping trip to get some new things that fit me. I just haven't been able to handle a trip yet but hopefully in the next two weeks my stomach will settle some (*crossing my fingers*) since I'll be entering the 2nd trimester.

As rough and uncomfortable its been so far, seeing the baby made every tough moment completely worth it. In that moment of seeing the little growing life inside my belly, every ache and sickness, didn't even matter. All that I cared about was that the baby was healthy and growing. I'm beyond grateful at the chance to experience pregnancy and the opportunity to become a mother. I'm thrilled to see Josh so elated and to have such a wonderful partner stand beside me as we venture down this new path.  My heart is overwhelmingly full.

Small Fingers, Small Toe's, Your Forehead, My Nose...

                                         
We're Pregnant! :-)  Its such a planned and hoped for event, yet still so surprising and unreal.  The past month I had been tracking my hormone levels with the Clear Blue fertility monitor.  We hadn't been using birth control for the past 13 months in hopes of starting a family, but with everything my ankle injury brought  this past year, our baby plans were sort of in the back of our minds. But at the same time, since we hadn't been doing anything to avoid getting pregnant for 13 months and hadn't yet, we decided to go ahead and invest in a fertility monitor.  While it was a bit expensive, I loved it right away and will definitely use it for any future additions to our family.  :-)  I'm fascinated by how the human body works and all the intricate details that work together to function on a daily basis, and so seeing the varying hormone levels on the monitor over the past month was really neat.

Thanksgiving Day morning, I woke up at 5am and knew that I was supposed to be getting my period at some point that day.  So while Josh was still sleeping, I went into the bathroom and figured I would go ahead and do a pregnancy test and then restart my monitor to track for the next month. I had no idea I was pregnant.  Josh had told me the week before that he thought I was pregnant because I was acting a bit different. I shrugged it off as pms symptoms. (Thinking about it now, its pretty funny that he knew I was pregnant before I even did, lol)  So I did the test and decided to wash my face and brush my teeth while waiting for the results.  When the test beeped and I saw the words "pregnant"  I let out such a loud gasp/squeal that it woke Josh up. I rushed out of our bathroom with the pregnancy test in my hand and Josh knew before I could even get the words out. We were both SO excited. After hugs, checking/rechecking the test, excited "Oh my gosh we're pregnant!" I said to Josh, "I have to call your mom!" He laughed at me and pointed out that it was 5am our time and 4am their time (Josh's parents live in the panhandle of Florida and so are an hour behind us) But I was SO excited, I had no idea how I was going to keep that news in.  I managed to wait until 6am (making it 5am for them) before I sent a picture text message to Josh's parents and sister, Salena.  I sent the picture posted above of the positive pregnancy test saying "Happy Thanksgiving Grandpa, Nana, and Aunt Salena!"  And seconds later we were on the phone with Josh's parents, lol.  They were both so excited at the news and we all couldn't believe it. Salena excitedly called us and has been so much fun talking to about it. She's been through this twice before having had our nephew and niece, making her an expert as far as we're concerned. :-) So her tips and advice has been fun and helpful and I'm sure will be greatly needed with the coming months.  We then sent the same text picture to my grandmother saying "Happy Thanksgiving Great Grandma!"  She had tears of joy and was thrilled for us. :-)  It was so much fun to get to tell family such exciting news on Thanksgiving Day.  We were able to call and tell Josh's grandparents later that afternoon. Grandpa's response was "Praise God, what a day of Thanksgiving!"  I've loved each and every response and its been such a fun few days.  I know its often advised to wait until farther along to announce the news, but once I saw the positive result, I just knew it was going to be impossible for me to hold in such exciting news.  :-)

Its been overwhelmingly heart warming to see such an excited responses from friends and family about our good news. My two very best friends, Beverly Paul and Kelly Medlin, who are most accurately described as my sisters at heart, have both made me tear up with their reactions at our news. I'm wonderfully blessed to be surrounded by a community of love and support.  And can't wait to see how God directs our steps on this new path of parenthood.

"Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart."  Psalm 37:4

Blessings

I recently heard a song titled "Blessings" by Laura Story.  The words struck me and have stayed with me since hearing them. Particularly the chorus:

"Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops

 What if your healing comes through tears

 What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know you're near

 What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise" 

 2012 has been a year of trial and difficulty for us in multiple ways, and yet God has provided encouragement and purpose throughout it. Its the most curious thing to me that happiness and encouragement has remained constant within us despite very difficult moments.  I've found God reminding me of the fullness I have around me in the moments when the lost is what I'm seeing.  

2012 has been a year of me learning patience and what it means to ask for and accept help.  I know my blog posts of late of rambled on continuously about a spirit of thankfulness, but I simply can't seem to describe it differently.  I'm blown away with how God has so intricately and timely placed events together and surrounded me with the family he has.

Josh has developed into such a leader for our home and constantly finds a way to make me smile. I never could have imagined marriage being as good as it is. Late night movie marathons, crack of dawn early morning talks, playful moments with our puppies, tickles and kisses over gut wrenching laughs about absolutely nothing have filled me with a contentment I've never felt before.

My in-laws Jay and Betty have repeatedly showered me with love and support lacing both Josh and I with a "safety net" so to speak.  Its an amazing comfort knowing that though physically 5 hours from us, they are simply a phone call away.  I've never met two people with such a non judging approach to people and situations.  Since becoming apart of the "Grace family"  I've been blown away at the patience and genuineness at the heart of it.   I've also been blessed with a sister-in-law who is the embodiment of both beauty and strength, while still somehow a mix of Josh's sense of humor, lol.   My darling nephew and niece who I'm so excited to see grow and continue to develop their little personalities.  Phone calls from Grandpa & Grandma Schwartz just to check on us and see how we and the puppies are doing are so valued.  And fun visits with Grandma Sydor as coffee and dessert turns into hours of conversation as we "solve the worlds problems" are precious memories.

I suppose my family is often the topic of my blog as I truly believe the saying "it takes a village," though I apply it not only to that of raising a child, but also to creating a happy and fulfilling journey through life. Bad things happen, disappointments arise, struggles can appear overwhelming. But being surround by comforting hands diminish the difficulty and create smiles along the way out of the storm.  What a difference community makes. How much louder "We've got this" resounds over storms that sometimes arise.

My heart is full

(Here is the youtube clip of the song "Blessings" mentioned above. enjoy!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOOFAaUGfRE

Picture Post: our summer so far

 Tele Turned 2 so we threw him a birthday party :-) silly I know, but cute pictures and fun day

 Lucy had to have an emergency surgery and this is her "special" cone. The vet couldn't get her to keep the normal one on. lol. Stubborn puppy, lol.

                                        Lucy Love the camera, she always looks right into the lens

                                    Here is me out of the wheelchair for our anniversary dinner/date

                                              My favorite board game EVER: RISK

                                                                    Happiness

                                                                Who is going to win?

                                                    Josh and Grandpa at Josh's Grad party

                                              Taking pictures with Momma Betty :-)

                                              Putting up the Beach Umbrella! YAY!

                                                                          Friends

                                                                     Summer Love

                                                                    Messy Beach Hair

                                                                     Best Friends :-)

                                          Hat, Sunglasses, sunscreen = no sun burn for me!

                                                                   Beach Kisses

                                                         The reason I smile everyday

                                                                   Our Beach spot :-)

                                                   I've got the cutest husband

                                                                Josh swimming

                                                                        Bed Bums

I told Tele that he was going to see "Grandma and Grandpa" he ran and jumped into the car, lol.

                                             This is how Tele greets Josh EVERY time he comes home!

                                                          Me and My niece Julia :-)  cutie pie

                                              Josh, me, and Salena at Carson's Birthday

                                                                     Playful puppies

                                                                   Dear Friends

                                           Tele got to dress up for the party  :-)

                                            Lucy too! :-)

                                                                   Best Buds

                                                                Family :-)

                                                                       Awesome

                                                                     Party Decorations!

                                           This picture pretty says it all :-)  we're happy  :-)

                                                     YAY! JOSH! :-)

                                                    Norma, Grandma, Grandma, Grandpa

                                                                        Flamingo Straws

                                                       Party Food:  YUM!

                          The cake I made for Josh's party, white cake, whipped cream, strawberries

                                                                   Battle time

                                                                      so serious

                                              Me and Tele taking our traditional party picture

Graduations, parties, anniversaries

Its been awhile since my last post.  The May and June months seemed over in the blink of an eye and were a whirlwind of fun events.  It was a great way to kick off the hot, humid (horrible) Florida summer months.

The beginning of the festivities was that Josh has finally graduated with his undergrad!!!! :-)  He now has a Bachelor's Degree in Sociology from Florida State University. I'm incredibly proud of him that its finally finished and it was such a big deal to him as it has been a long time goal.  So to celebrate, we had a great party with family and friends at our house.  I even put up luau decorations and Josh fired up the grill.  It was such a fun party and also fun weekend as our family in Mariana and Georgia were able to come down to visit for the weekend.  Which completely spoiled our puppies.  They LOVE it when Josh's family comes to visit.  I also, as a surprise for Josh, arranged for dear friends of our's from Mariana to come down for the party.  Josh had no idea they were coming until he opened the front door, lol.  It was a lot of fun.  My grandmother and several other close friends were able to make it to the party too. Since about 8 of the guests were from out of town, we had a full house overnight as well.  Which led to a combative game of RISK that evening.  I think the game lasted around 5 hours and still ended in a stalemate.  Who doesn't love trying to conquer the world? :-)

Then the following week it was our turn to go up and visit our family in Mariana as my nephew Carson turned 2 years old! :-)  He isn't a baby at all anymore, so much a little man now.  My sister-in-law threw a Mickey Mouse themed party for him and it was absolutely adorable.  Josh and I also finally got the chance to meet our new niece Julia.  She was born a couple days after my surgery, so we hadn't been able to travel to see her yet and it was wonderful finally getting to see her.  So pretty in pink with her flower head band and tutu.  She is so sweet already and quite the little princess of the family. :-)

May also held Josh and I's 2nd Wedding Anniversary!! I can't believe that its been 2 whole years already.  So much has happened, changed, and developed.  Life couldn't be more different than it was 2 years ago and I also couldn't be happier.  Its been amazing seeing how God has opened unexpected doors and brought us to where we are.  Times haven't always been as smooth as I would like (i.e. would have loved to skip the whole ankle ordeal) but even the difficult times have brought forth positive elements to them.  I'm so thankful for the partnership I have with Josh and I love the family and friends that we are surrounded by. 2 years ago, I never would of guessed that I'd have a lovely house (in lakeland!), 2 adorable puppies, and be so happy.  I'm certainly blessed and incredibly thankful.

In about a week, it will be 6months since I got hurt and broke my ankle. The nightmare of the ordeal is lessening each week.  I still have a pretty consistent pain level and am still limited on how far I can push my ankle.  But as of last week- I'm finally walking on my own two feet ALL day.  I had previously been having to use the wheelchair in the evenings still, but  made it all last week without using it at all.  My ankle is still pretty swollen so at the moment I can wear either my running shoes or my flip flops, lol.  At my last doctor visit, the doctor gave me a brace to wear under my shoes to give my ankle more support.  And he put me on new meds to help with pain.  I had managed to stop taking Perocet and Vicodon in Febuary and didn't take anything at all for about 3 months.  But when I started pushing my ankle harder my pain increased significantly so I started taking perocet again.  Which I really didn't want to do since its pretty strong and wiped my energy levels out completely.  So my doctor put me on 1000mg of Naproxen and it made a INCREDIBLE difference.  I have been able to walk better and push my ankle so much farther without being crippled by pain.  I've had SO much more energy and the swelling in my ankle went done 2 centimeters (according to measurements by the nurse).  Its been wonderful.  So I took the 1000mg for about 2 weeks and now planning on taking only 500mg for the next 3 weeks.  After than I'm hoping to be at a point where I can just deal with the pain since I'm not really a fan of taking meds on a regular basis.  I still have a pretty significant limp when I walk, but my doctor has told me that as I strengthen the muscles it will go away.  So far I've managed to walk .62 of a mile in 25 minutes. I know that sounds like a long time for such a short distance, but I've still got to take slower steps with my ankle.  I'm working hard to build up endurance and push my ankle farther each day.  Currently my best way to exercise has been our stationary bike. I've been able to do 20 miles a day with that and its helped a lot.   I had been recommended another month of physical therapy, but decided to try and just work on my ankle myself for the next month and see how improvement goes.  Since I have done 10 weeks of therapy already, I'm famaliar with the exercises my ankle needs and most of it I'm able to do at home.  We decided it would be better financially to try this for a month as my physical therapy has cost about $1,000 so far and added up to the other 6 medical bills it was ridiculously expensive. So I told Josh I would try it on my own for a month and if I don't see improve at my next doctor visit, that I'd ask for another prescription for physical therapy again.  I am working hard, so I think my doctor will see improvements.

Another new improvement has concerned our Bluetick puppy Lucy.  8 weeks ago, Josh started the "couch to 5k" running program and has been taking Lucy running with him.  The change in her behavior is incredible and she is SO much more pleasant to be around.  She is listening much better and seems to love the extra individual attention.  Now when she see's Josh put his running shoes on, she gets super excited and tries to open the drawer where we keep her leach at.  She has made a fun little running buddy for him.

Despite the past two months being crazy busy, they were filled with fun filled events and lots of time with family.  Even a few beach days :-) Definitely going to sneak in several more beach trips before the summer is over. :-)